Missie and Rose copyright me, the rest copyright Disney and used without permissions

Bunnies and Ducks Don't Mix

By Missie DuCaine

Rose stumbled as she walked into the kitchen at the Pond. Chocolate long-eared creatures covered the table, and brightly coloured eggs were rather pathetically half-hidden around the room.

Phil clambered out from under the table, grinning from ear to ear. "Spiffy, ain't it?"

Rose shook her head. "It's...different, Phil." She lifted her eyebrow at the cardboard bunny with a basket of eggs taped to the fridge. "But what is it?"

He shot her a dry look. "It's Easter today, Rose."

She glanced at him as she turned on the coffee maker. "Easter is about that Jesus Christ guy rising from the dead, Phil. Not...chocolate and eggs."

"Yeah, well, chocolate and eggs are a big plus side."

She lifted a foil wrapped egg with the team logo plastered all over the wrapping. "And so is crass merchandising, I see."

He snatched it away. "Well, I have to pay for the damage you guys do somehow!"

Rose sighed, shaking her head, and poured herself a cup of coffee. "You're hopeless, Phil."

***

That afternoon, Rose walked into the Ready Room, raising an eyebrow at the sight of most of her team mates chowing down on chocolate.

She leaned over the back of the couch, and snatched one of the foil wrapped eggs from Missie's pile. "What is the attraction with these things?" she demanded.

Missie glanced at her. "Those are the caramel-filled one, Rose. They're amazing."

"Uh-huh." She unwrapped it, and popped it in her beak. "Whatever."

***

10 minutes later, Rose lay on her bed, reading a magasine. Her tongue ran over her teeth, licking the last traces of caramel from the cracks. That candy had been oddly...satisfying.

She stood up. She was sure nobody would mind if she took a couple more...

***

Nobody was in the kitchen, so Rose calmly unwrapped one of the team logo eggs. She bit into it, surprised to find white and yellow gloop inside.

Hmm. She licked it off her fingers. "Disturbing. But tasty."

After finishing off a bag of the eggs, she turned to the pile of bunnies on the table. She gnawed the ear off one, tasting it experimentally. Satisfied, she picked up the entire pile - and it was a large one - and left the kitchen.

***

"Phil? Weren't there chocolate bunnies on the table here?"

Phil glanced at Missie, then at the table. "Yeah..." He said slowly. "And quite a few of them, if I remember correctly."

She shrugged. "Well, they're gone now."

***

As she licked the last of the chocolate off her fingers, Rose had ceased to have any specific concious thought. She had only one goal, and only one obhective.

Chocolate.

***

"Rose..." Tanya said slowly, trying to near the duck, who was sitting on the couch, eating every piece of chocolate in sight.

The other lept up suddenly, looking at the scientist suspiciously, then backed slowly away, before spinning and racing out of the Ready Room.

Tanya stood there for a long moment, blinking.

"Methinks I need to do a little blood work," she said, then turned and headed for her lab.

***

There was no more chocolate.

Rose sat on her bed, shivering. She needed chocolate. Lots of it.

Now.

***

"See?" Tanya pointed to her charts. "Rose has been eating too much chocolate. It's messing with her endorphin levels."

"With her what?" Wildwing asked.

"Her endorphin levels. Endorphin's a hormone affected by chocolate, giving you a feel-good feeling. Only problem is, according to my calculations, Rose has gone completely off the chart."

"And that's a bad thing, right?"

"Oh, definently." She confirmed.

He frowned. "I'd better go see about this."

***

Rose bumped into Wildwing in the hall, surprising him. "Hey, Rose, Tanya and I were just thinking maybe you shouldn't be eating any more chocolate."

Her eyes narrowed. "Are you going to try to stop me?"

He blinked. Rose had never tried to undermine his authority before. "Well, yes. Rose, you have already had too much, and Tanya thinks-"

Wildwing was cut off suddenly, as his hands flew to his head. He sank to his knees, choaking as his head was bombarded with powerful and very painful psionic energy.

Rose glared at him, then stepped around him and ran away. As soon as she had left the hall the pain ceased, and he slid to the floor, gasping as he tried to clear his head.

***

"Rose attacked you?!" Missie gasped.

"I don't know anyone else who has complete control over psi energy, do you?" He asked dryly.

"It's not really her fault," Tanya tried to sooth things over. "She's being controlled by her endorphins." Seeing Missie's baffled look, she added, "So she needs chocolate."

"So what can we do?" Missie demanded.

Wildwing sighed. "Wait until her sugar buzz's disappeared."

***

The team sat around the television, watching the news.

"And in other news, an unknown, destructive individual has attacked several confectionary stores in the area."

They showed a black and white security video, of a tall, duck woman attacking the chocolate display cases, ripping through the packaging.

"The woman has not harmed anyone, but they have eaten all the chocolate." The reporter smiled. "Back to you, Bob."

Bob grinned. "Someone's going to have a tummyache in the morning! In other news-"

Duke turned the TV off. "Well, at least Rose isn't a well-known team member."

Tanya gave him an odd look. "Why is that good?"

Duke smiled grimly. "Nobody recognises her."

***

Wildwing walked into the Ready Room the next morning, stopping short when he saw someone laying on the couch.

As he walked closer, he realised it was Rose, chesnut hair a mess, her eyes closed.

He crouched before her, and she cracked open red eyes. "Good morning, sunshine."

She groaned. "I feel awaful," she said, her voice sounding muffled.

"Well, you did just eat more chocolate in a day than most eat in 10 years." He smiled slightly. "So, are you in a more socialble mood today?"

"Huh?"

He tapped his forehead. "You attacked me yesterday. Psionically."

She blinked. "I did? I don't remember."

Standing, Wildwing ruffled her hair. "Sounds to me like you've got a chocolate hangover. Get some rest."

***

"Well? Figured it out yet?"

Wildwing looked over Tanya's shoulder, as she tapped the screen. "Yep. Seems Saurians don't have endorphins, but ducks do. Her body gets along fine when her endorphin level is low, but when it gets unbalanced, she goes nuts. She needs to keep that level up then, like a drug or caffine fix. Only she plateued, then went back down. That's why she has a 'chocolate hangover' now."

"So she'll be fine?"

Tanya shrugged. "So long as she stays away from chocolate."

***

"Hey."

Rose blinked up at Wildwing. "Yes?"

"Tanya says you won't have a problem, so long as you cut chocolate out of your diet."

She groaned, even as her eyes turned back to blue, from their enraged red. Rubbing her stomach, she lamented, "I don't want to see chocolate again. In fact, I don't even want to hear the word chocolate again."

Missie chose that moment to stroll in, drinking from a mug.

Rose sniffed the air. "Mmm. What is that?"

"Hot chocolate." Missie said, blowing over the mug.

Rose's eyes lit up. "Can I try it?"

Wildwing slapped his forehead. "Not again..."


The End
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